Keep your eye on the prize
How I finally became a British citizen (and stopped letting perfectionism slow me down).
I became a British citizen in January, something that I was eligible for years ago.
What held me back were the requirements: logging every trip in and out of the UK for the last five years (as someone who travels A LOT, that felt overwhelming), getting biometrics done, finding letters of reference, paying a fee.
One of the biggest mental blockers for me was the test that you have to take. I heard British people say, “Oh, I heard it’s really hard. I’m sure I couldn’t pass it.”
So I had it in my mind that the test was this massive obstacle and it would take me months to study if I wanted to ace it.
But then I realized: my priority goal wasn’t to score perfectly on an exam – it was to become a citizen of the country I’d been living in for almost 15 years.
Progress over perfection
So, after years of delay, I chose an exam date three weeks into the future and started cramming my buns off. I had less than a month to remember facts such as Bobby Moore being captain for England when it won the World Cup in 1966.
I took 40 online practice tests and noted the areas unfamiliar to me.
I created little stories to help dates and names stick in my temporary memory. For example, the first British Prime Minister was Sir Robert Walpole (1721 to 1742): Everyone dance around the Walpole – we have our first prime minister in Westminster!
And then on the morning of the exam, I ate a veggie crepe at La Petite Bretagne, walked into the testing center, handed over my phone and underwent an unusually thorough body search to make sure I wasn’t hiding any notes (story for another time?), and passed the Life in the UK Test.
When I moved past the distraction of feeling like I had to score 100 on the test and clarified what really mattered – citizenship – everything moved forward and I had my UK passport in a matter of months.
(Sidenote: Maybe it would be different if I were taking an exam to be a brain surgeon, but I’m not sure remembering that the daffodil is Wale’s national flower will make me a good citizen. For a few months after I took the exam, though, I definitely had an edge at pub quizzes.)
Maximizers and satisficers
What is it that you really want? It’s easy to get lost in our to-do list and take our eyes off the prize.
For example, your goal might be to move abroad, but then you get so lost in finding the perfect suitcase that it prevents you from moving forward. That’s where the difference between maximizers and satisficers comes in.
Research describes maximizers as people who want the best of everything. They’ll spend weeks researching the “right” option, and even after deciding, they’ll go back and check again. Satisficers make a choice once it meets their needs and then move forward.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting quality, but maximizer thinking can easily pull you off course – often because it’s rooted in fear. Fear of being disappointed. Fear of wasting time. Fear of failing.
I see this in my coaching clients all the time – perfectionism showing up as procrastination. It feels safer to keep preparing than to face the possibility of falling short.
That fear kept me aiming for a perfect score when all I needed to reach my real goal – citizenship – was to pass.
When you keep your focus on the main goal, it’s easier to see which decisions actually matter and which ones are just distractions dressed up as “being thorough.”
Focus on the right target
This shows up in so many parts of life – we tinker with the small, comfortable things while putting off the step that actually gets us to the goal.
Where in life might you be obsessing over the minor goal and losing track of the major goal?
Are you spending so much time fine-tuning your LinkedIn profile that you never send the email that could actually open the next door for you? Or maybe, like me, you’re aiming for a perfect score on something when “good enough” would get you exactly where you want to go.
The moment you name what really matters – and start moving toward it – everything else gets simpler, and progress finally happens.
I help people like you move past perfectionism and focus on what really matters, so you can make progress on the goals that matter most to you. Visit sarahmikutel.com